Im Just Cameron. This is my Blog.

Today is Tuesday April 08,2008 and I have ADD.

with that said I will begin.

1. life
2. school
3. god

1. so not much is going on with me. lately i am getting frustrated REALLY easy. the other night i went to chili's with Devon Kaitlyn and Shanita. all the close friends. in the 45 minute ride to PA to find somewhere to eat(yes i said 45 minute ride) i went from being(in my opinion) in a good mood to being totally on edge and about to kill some1 with a sonic cup. it started with Devon's keys being gone and him crying for 20 minutes about that. then a debate about how we cant say the "F" word in front of Devon because it offends him(he cant give us a reason). he once again says I NEED MY KEYS. then we FINALLY get to a restaurant that we all agree on and as Devon gets out of the car. Shanita pulls Devon's keys out of her console. I ALMOST KILLED HER. well we go in the restaurant and they are closed. TAKE NOTE: we couldn't eat applebee's because Kaitlyn had some bad experiences. we couldn't eat seafood of Chinese because its of the devil. no Mexican because of Devon(really important(the other three of us are all up for Mexican)) Shanita doesn't really care. we finally just say chili's and we go in sit down to order and Devon says I'm just gunna get desert(I SWEAR TO JESUS IF I WOULDN'T HAVE LITTERED THAT SONIC CUP OUT THE WINDOW). i was in a really pissy mood now. well i realized that was because i hadn't had food since the night before. but the lesson in this was these people were really great friends. i love them, and i would never kill them.

2. the days are getting longer and longer. School is dragging along with only 2 months left. i hate the end of the year(well i hate the whole year but the end is the worse) because we have spring break and then the not another day off until the end of the year. I'm tired. i don't want to go back next year. I'm thinking home school or GED. not really. my mom would never let me get a GED and i dint think i want one either. it would suck to have made it in school for 12 years and then just throw it all away. but home school...definitely an option.

3. i had a nice talk at chili's with mainly Kaitlyn and Shanita... its funny what a lack of eating makes you learn about yourself. so it all started with the thought "i should go to church". i dint think i like what church is. went to second baptist for 5 years and in about a month all of that was over. i love God and i know that God loves me. I KNOW that isn't enough... its just hard. i was Pentecostal for a the majority of my life and i learned things then i stopped believing in god. then i started the whole baptist thing. and now I'm looking for some other type of closure. i miss it. i think i used second as a safety blanket. for the last year and a half it just seemed to fall apart. i remember when we would have to sit on the floor in youth because there were so many people and then we went to having 4 people there on a regular night. it was sad to see it like that. it just wasn't meant to be. I'm just lost i guess and to be totally honest I'm not really looking to be found until i decide what i need to be found by.


that's all.